May 8, 2009

What's Worth Saying

A coworker mentioned that half of the conversations we have at work would be grounds for termination elsewhere. People here often describe us as family. It feels like work, but we kid around and have a strange bond. This week I counted at least 5 completely inappropriate conversations (making it a slow week). Today I mocked our sales rep for being bald. Earlier our discussion involved heavy sexual innuendos. My favourite was the sales manager discussing what grass would be like if it were gay. Gay grass? The surrounding details were equally strange.

Beyond the conversations, they have inappropriate games. A popular one on the dock is: “Would you sleep with (insert name) for a million dollars?” To which, after much discussion, the answer is always yes.

To be fair, this is a manufacturing shop. Nudie pictures in toolboxes or a relaxed vernacular should be expected. Blue-collar jobs have some advantages. If those advantages happen to sneak into the office, I’m not going to complain.

Characters used = 1,000


  1. I work with three male 60+ attorneys and 13 women (six are single) from ages 24 to 65. Then there's me, the 21 year old male. If there were a sexual harassment suit at my work, I'm sure it would take months just to sort through the evidence. Got pretty close, one female employee threatened to report the firm to some agency in Milwaukee after she claims she was sexually harassed by *seeing* another female employee make a humping motion on my back (while I was laying down). Needless to say, this was after she cheated on her husband with me (disgusting and reprehensible, I know and regret) and I told her that I could not continue doing such things; leading her to want to fight any woman in the office who looked me in the eye (or in many cases crawl on top of my desk [which is right next to hers]). I'm guessing that she figured out that carrying out this action would result in her being alienated (too late). Lesson learned: never screw around with the employee that sits next to you at work.

  2. @Howeezy Pics or it never happened.

  3. I think that extra character was well worth it! That was more interesting then anything I dare write. Your work place sounds worse than mine. Luckily for me, a lot of the stuff stays in the shop or goes over my head (I only get the surface). Screwing around at work is probably a bad idea, especially literally. A few years ago used condoms were found in a secluded area of the shop… That was on third shift. Things haven’t been nearly that heated since we reduced to two shifts.